With great appreciation, the following sharing from Mr. Micheal P. is gladly showed to open the dharma discussion page.

 

From:  Michael P.
Date: Wed, Jul 22, 2015 at 7:35 PM
Subject: RE: Morning meditation experience sharing.
 

For many years, when not working, I would meditate for long periods of time. I begin when I first wake up, sitting sit. I enter into samadhi where awareness is pure and detached. It happens naturally after having practiced for many years. Concentration is strong, awareness pure. There is a sense that all form is fleeting and evolving; Impermanent and without substance. No sense of self here or from other beings. Only pure universal awareness appearing as all sentient beings.

 

There is no self in this transcendental state. And the body walks, talks and drives the car. It moves about in detached serenity. There is a sense that this is my natural state of existence and that it will last forever. It doesn't.

 

On days when I must go to work, serenity may stay with me a little while in the morning. However I must use my mind to concentrate on many things at once including designing objects in a computer, while taking phone calls, being interrupted by staff, as well as solving various complex mental puzzles related to designing a building.

 

My mental and physical energy wanes as my concentration weakens. The deeply held hindrances, especially anger, arises. There is no longer serenity and equanimity. Only extreme mental fatigue. When I go home, I cannot move for a long time. I realize that I am too old to be doing this particular job.

 

Over the past few years, I have gone through this similar process, from nirvana to hell and back, every work day. There used to be days when serenity lasted all day, for many days. In the last few months, it becomes shorter and shorter during work time.

 

The days in which I do not work are times of prolonged equanimity. Timeless pure awareness and joy. Bliss arises from time to time, so strong that I cannot move. Sometimes I lose consciousness of being in this world. There is nothingness. These are the jhana states.

 

Samantha works with Vipassana. They are two wheels of the cart. Two wings of the bird. In samadhi it is really one state, the true and natural state. The other states are conditioned and unreal.

 

When concentration weakens, the hindrances arise because the mental concept that people and events are permanent and with substance. When concentration is strong, all things including people, including "my" character are realized to be impermanent and without substance.

 

My practice seems to be getting worst and not better. My work days are filled with prolonged times of frustration, anger and bitterness. I'm stuck in a rut.

(end of the email)

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In the above sharing and in speaking together, Michael P. acknowledged that he had practiced Samantha meditation for nearly 18 years. He is a highly seasoned meditator. The following is an extracted passage from the book "A taste of freedom" of Venerable Ajahn Chah (printed by "Narada Center" P.O box 1673 - Lynnwood, WA page 17). The Venerable Ajahn Chah teaching will more or less clarify the issue.                 Jagara Vinh Pham

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On Dangers Of Samādhi

Samādhi is capable of bringing much harm or much benefit to the meditator, you can't say it brings only one or the other. For one who has no wisdom it is harmful, but for one who has wisdom it can bring real benefit, it can lead to insight.

That which can possibly be harmful to the meditator is absorption samādhi (jhāna), the samādhi with deep, sustained calm. This samādhi brings great peace. Where there is peace, there is happiness. When there is happiness, attachment and clinging to that happiness arise. The meditator doesn't want to contemplate anything else, he just wants to indulge in that pleasant feeling. When we have been practising for a long time we may become adept at entering this samādhi very quickly. As soon as we start to note our meditation object, the mind enters calm, and we don't want to come out to investigate anything. We just get stuck on that happiness. This is a danger to one who is practising meditation.

We must use upacāra samādhi: Here, we enter calm and then, when the mind is sufficiently calm, we come out and look at outer activity*. Looking at the outside with a calm mind gives rise to wisdom. This is hard to understand, because it's almost like ordinary thinking and imagining. When thinking is there, we may think the mind isn't peaceful, but actually that thinking is taking place within the calm. There is contemplation but it doesn't disturb the calm. We may bring thinking up in order to contemplate it. Here we take up the thinking to investigate it, it's not that we are aimlessly thinking or guessing away; it's something that arises from a peaceful mind. This is called 'awareness within calm and calm within awareness'. If it's simply ordinary thinking and imagining, the mind won't be peaceful, it will be disturbed. But I am not talking about ordinary thinking, this is a feeling that arises from the peaceful mind. It's called 'contemplation'. Wisdom is born right here.

So, there can be right samādhi and wrong samādhi. Wrong samādhi is where the mind enters calm and there's no awareness at all. One could sit for two hours or even all day but the mind doesn't know where it's been or what's happened. It doesn't know anything. There is calm, but that's all. It's like a well-sharpened knife which we don't bother to put to any use. This is a deluded type of calm, because there is not much self-awareness. The meditator may think he has reached the ultimate already, so he doesn't bother to look for anything else. Samādhi can be an enemy at this level. Wisdom cannot arise because there is no awareness of right and wrong.

With right samādhi, no matter what level of calm is reached, there is awareness. There is full mindfulness and clear comprehension. This is the samādhi which can give rise to wisdom, one cannot get lost in it. Practisers should understand this well. You can't do without this awareness, it must be present from beginning to end. This kind of samādhi has no danger.

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* "outer activity" refers to all manners of sense impressions. It is used in contrast to the " inner activity" of absorption samadhi (jhana), where the mind does not "go out" to external sense impressions

 

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This is the second sharing from Michael P.

 

Vinh,

 

Since our last discussion, I have been contemplating and meditation with insight meditation methods.  I went back to review writings from Ajahn Chah as well as others.  I stumbled upon the attached paper by Ven Nanarama on Insight practice.

 

As with many teachings, you contemplate the truth over a period of time with no insight.  Then, you reread or hear the truth presented by another teacher and it "clicks".  In this paper, the truth of how the conditioned mind functions by responding to phenomena with wrong views composed of perceptions, feelings, mental formations and consciousness became very meaningful for me.  Although I have studied and contemplated that the world of impermanent form and the impermanent mental factors have no self, it has always been an intellectual exercise for me, and so, the truth did not penetrate to free my mind from the grasping false self.  Tonight that realization became truth.

 

My Zen Teacher (Ch'an) has mentioned that the hindrances are actually nothing more than imagination.  And I could understand that.  However, tonight, I focused very deeply into the actual functioning mind and how  as an  impermanent object, say a person, speaks certain words in an objective manner.  In some instances, my mind  will perceive what is said and add "poison" of past feelings and thoughts to the words.  This function of my mind is the  actual mechanics of how the hindrances arise.  That is, feelings stored in  memory in combination with concepts triggered by the wrong interpretation of the present event.

 

In other words, my mind is adding feelings and concepts from bad and hurtful memories to the resent moment event.  This creates  new bad feelings with myself and the  other person as well.

 

However, what is most important is to realize that these deeply held feelings and memories are held together by a false self. Not only is this self image or personality created  by the mind but it is the root source of the hindrances including feelings and memories.  The false self  has never existed nor has the feelings or  judgment thoughts created around this false self.  It is all imagination held together  by ignoring the truth.     

 

Immediately, there is  a sense of freedom in realizing that not only is the false self made up of imagination, but also the hindrances that cause so much grief and misery. 

 

I have contemplated this so many times in the  past.  However, tonight there was clarity in the realization of this truth that has provided a  very deep sense of freedom.

 

The attached paper  touches on this subject in a more "round about" manner.  I believe that the purpose  of insight meditation is to realize for yourself that all objects of matter are impermanent and without substance, but also that the mind perceiving each object is impermanent and without substance.  And the hindrances are the mental conditions the mind developed over the years due to ignorance.  And all hindrances are connected to the root of a false self.  When we realize this truth, we see these things as apparitions or unreal mental concepts that actually never existed.

 

I look forward to the next mediation retreat.

 

With metta,

 

Michael Pursley

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